TV/Movies Megathread

[katmai]

 

Biggest problem was the red chick was a pinch on the butch side.

[Ideologue]

Biggest problem was the red chick was a pinch on the butch side.

Lookswise or character?

I enjoyed the character quite a bit--the only bad thing was her introduction in the Hall of Science and Waffles or whatever ought to have been cut, leaving her to be introduced mysteriously when she's falling out of the airship, two scenes between which there is no bridging sequence in the final cut anyway--and if you mean lookswise I don't even know what you're seeing, Lynn Collins is not the most beautiful, but who is?  Jane Levy maybe.  But she's definitely beautiful.

Actually, I take back what I said about more skin.  The amount actually revealed was fine, but the camera didn't even attempt a single skeeve on her.  Not at all like Hodges did with Ornella Muti (or even Melody Anderson) in Flash Gordon.  Filmed her like they would a dude.  Um, feminist victory, I guess.  Awesome.  Guess I've got a long way to go.

[Ideologue]

Biggest problem was the red chick was a pinch on the butch side.

Maybe he means the Green Martian woman.

[katmai]

Anybody checked out Byzantium yet?

[Ideologue]

Anybody checked out Byzantium yet?

I wanted to, but it didn't play around here, even in our (lousy) arthouse theater.

No I'm So Excited or Grandmaster either.

[katmai]

Lynn Collins is not the most beautiful, but who is? 

I'd give Ide's left nut to be with Lynn Collins, and both of his to be with Jane Leavy.

[katmai]

Anybody checked out Byzantium yet?

I wanted to, but it didn't play around here, even in our (lousy) arthouse theater.

Yeah hasn't made it here either but read it's on demand already....

[Eddie Teach]

Jane Levy maybe.

Looked her up on IMDB. Chick from Suburgatory. I approve. But not of the show.

[katmai]

1st season was fine, 2nd not so much.

[Ideologue]

Jane Levy maybe.

Looked her up on IMDB. Chick from Suburgatory. I approve. But not of the show.

She was also Mia in Evil Dead.  Really fine overactress, less good but serviceable at more subdued stuff based on her performance in that.

There's a line in Evil Dead where she tells her bro that she "looks like roadkill."  I thought in the theater and on my recent rewatch at home that this is the most bullshit line in history, that needed to be cut the minute they cast Jane Levy.  But then I looked up some pictures of her not in Evil Dead, and holy shit, that is her looking like roadkill, and she's still a Goddamned 9.5 at the very least.

So now that line is just intensely condescending.  With great beauty comes great responsibility.

[Ideologue]

Anybody checked out Byzantium yet?

I wanted to, but it didn't play around here, even in our (lousy) arthouse theater.

Yeah hasn't made it here either but read it's on demand already....

I've really been a fan of how they've been doing that recently with smaller movies like Europa Report and Maniac, and I think American Mary did it too, though I missed that and I'm just getting it on disc.  Hopefully Grandmaster follows suit--it's my second most anticipated movie remaining of the year (esteemed Chinese director known principally for his thoughtful personal stories, making a movie featuring Zhang Ziyi and kung fu?  Do distributors not remember 2000?).  May well check out Byzantium, too.

[Admiral Yi]

Lookswise or character?

Former.

[lustindarkness]

I enjoyed John Carter, good movie.

[Tonitrus]

Anybody checked out Byzantium yet?

I wanted to, but it didn't play around here, even in our (lousy) arthouse theater.

Yeah hasn't made it here either but read it's on demand already....

No Ottoman Empire. 

[Neil]

(Bearing in mind I've never read the Edgar Rice Borroughs books; cannot speak to fidelity.)

Took me a long time to get to it, which is still sooner than a majority of the viewing public, but I finally got to John Carter (2012).  Count me amongst the growing number of folks who are slowly rehabilitating the famous flop: it's really close to great.

Story's rad, action and humor top-notch.  Most of my serious complaints are production design-related--the movie doesn't look quite as amazing as it should.  It does look good, but often things are too undifferentiated, and its colors not as vibrant as they needed to be.  Mars should've been a bit redder, the Red Martians maybe a bit redder still, the Green Martians greener, and most importantly the Helians and the Zodangans needed to be differentiated beyond "kind of Egyptian armor, with blue highlights" and "kind of Egyptian armor, with red highlights."  There is a "predator city," that never predates--that'd have been fun to see.  And maybe some more cheesecake with Delah.  Just a bit?  Is that sexist?  I still want her to be capable and scientific, just less dressed, in true planetary romance fashion, because masturbating in the 1920s sure did involve the imagination.

And while I came to accept and enjoy John Carter Action Comics #1ing all over the damn place with surely no less than 100% physical accuracy, that awful Lockjaw dog thing was a bridge too far--breaking the goofy scale, and really unfortunately omnifuckingpresent.

Still, while not approaching the 1980 masterpiece, it really is a worthy spiritual successor to Flash Gordon, pulpy and funny and full of preposterous action (and adding a little genuine human emotion on the margins, which was weird yet not misplaced).  Further, it shows what a hack fucktard Gore Verbinski is; and unlike Lone Ranger, this movie did not deserve to fail.

The disc, of course, is teal blue.  Disney's inability to market this wonderful movie really is infinite, isn't it?

B+

Good for you Ide.  If you had hated on John Carter, I would have had to crush you.