My father is sad.

[Grey Fox]

Maybe your dad should start standing up for himself.

Step 1 : Learn English.

Also, nice career. I should have joined the Forces 4-5 years ago.

[Martinus]

That sucks. Seeing one's parents helpless and lost must be one of the saddest things in life. Tell your dad not to overwork himself into an early grave.

[Martinus]

Oh, I would have also suggested that your dad finds out if there are any state-sponsored programmes (e.g. to learn English, or to be protected against bullying/discrimination) but I guess you would be against any such unconscionable waste of taxpayers' money just to protect some minority's member's dignity, worth, self-image and personal pride.

After all, it's not like the society would recover every single dime invested in allowing your father to feel like a respected, valued member of the community he is, would it?

[Valmy]

I know how you feel as my asian mom went through the same thing. Then she quit working and started living off of alimony/child support. 

Shit really?  I had no idea Asian people faced this sort of thing in this country.  I guess it is when they still have the accent?

[Malthus]

I know how you feel as my asian mom went through the same thing. Then she quit working and started living off of alimony/child support. 

Shit really?  I had no idea Asian people faced this sort of thing in this country.  I guess it is when they still have the accent?

I suspect that it has very much to do with social class. An Asian in the professional ranks would likely not face this sort of thing: blue collar, more likely.

[Korea]

I know how you feel as my asian mom went through the same thing. Then she quit working and started living off of alimony/child support. 

Shit really?  I had no idea Asian people faced this sort of thing in this country.  I guess it is when they still have the accent?

I suspect that it has very much to do with social class. An Asian in the professional ranks would likely not face this sort of thing: blue collar, more likely.

I think you are right.

[Richard Hakluyt]

It doesn't take many bigots to make things unpleasant. Maybe 99/100 of the interactions that an asian chap has with a white person are fine. The one in a hundred might translate to an unpleasant incident every month or so..........well, that would really piss me off.

[saskganesh]

sorry for your dad. sounds like he needs a  crash course in NA culture.

first up: we learned all this stuff as children. when we got bullied at school the worst thing one could do was tell the teacher (i.e supervisor). you lost face and respect in the yard, and even if the bully was disciplined, the teacher also would be somewhat disgusted with the bullied for not being able to solve their own problems. it's really no win.

what worked was 1) ignoring the bully (amazingly, it can work, they are just looking for easy targets) or 2) getting even. this probably means finding allies. remember, revenge can be sweet.

[Eochaid]

what worked was 1) ignoring the bully (amazingly, it can work, they are just looking for easy targets) or 2) getting even. this probably means finding allies. remember, revenge can be sweet.

  P5, is there any way you can make your father look more like Mr Miyagi? 

On a more serious note you can try asking some friends from the army to come pick up your dad with you at work, wearing your uniform (not the full attire, but something a bit more impressive than battle fatigues).If bullies see you and your friends "being cool" with your dad, they'll probably back off.

If they don't, go back and flex some muscle explaining that while your father is a nice quiet man who doesn't give a shit about them, you on the other hand don't like racism and will gouge their eyes out and skullfuck them if they ever go near him ever again. Then tell them you weren't scared in Fallujah and you sure as hell aren't gonna take any shit from a bunch of pussies like them.

Kevin

[saskganesh]

I think a stunt like that could go over very well.

[Grey Fox]

Check if you can borrow a Tank or a Predator Drone to emphasize your point.

[KRonn]

Well Phillip V, I'd say your father has done very well. He's gone through hardships coming from Cambodia (did he come as a refugee, escape during the wars they had there?), just to come to a new and very different culture.  Now he's working hard, raising a family, making things better for his kids. Sure he has things to be sad about; the financial hit is distressing, but it's been a blow to so many people. Not his fault.

As for the people picking on him. I wonder if most of them were born in the US, never had to go through the difficulties your father did. Bunch of cretins, especially if that's the case, as they're criticizing but have no idea and never had to face the difficulties he has.

[Martinus]

It doesn't take many bigots to make things unpleasant. Maybe 99/100 of the interactions that an asian chap has with a white person are fine. The one in a hundred might translate to an unpleasant incident every month or so..........well, that would really piss me off.

Yeah. This is pretty much the usual mechanism these days. It's one of the reasons I am not out at work - it's that I expect to be fired or ostracized, but I don't want to deal with a crap like that, chuckles behind my back, fag jokes and the like. It's not like I'm going to run to the management every time it happens etc.

[The Brain]

It doesn't take many bigots to make things unpleasant. Maybe 99/100 of the interactions that an asian chap has with a white person are fine. The one in a hundred might translate to an unpleasant incident every month or so..........well, that would really piss me off.

Yeah. This is pretty much the usual mechanism these days. It's one of the reasons I am not out at work - it's that I expect to be fired or ostracized, but I don't want to deal with a crap like that, chuckles behind my back, fag jokes and the like. It's not like I'm going to run to the management every time it happens etc.

Yeah no way you'd hang around a place like that.

[The Brain]

Anyway, hope the situation improves for Mr. Dad. Maybe the key bully quits or gets in a freak gardening accident or something.