The Myth of the Barter Economy: How did pre-coinage economies work?

[Oexmelin]

The "natural order" required huge amounts to stifling and conforming communal control it seems to me. You don't fuck with others because you are afraid of what they might do to you, or worse being expelled from your community which back in the day wasn't exactly a death sentence but close to it. I can see the advantages and comforts if you like your community and your place within it but the conformity and social control doesn't seem very utopia-esque to me. It is just another social system with its advantages and disadvantages.

From the outside, it certainly feels stiffling, but a lot of it has to do with upbringing and expectations. European observers of American Indigenous societies regularly commented upon their stoicism, their slowness to anger, and the extremely long (and tedious) speeches they would make to describe grievances. Which, of course, doesn't mean conflicts wouldn't emerge. One of the sources of "ethnogenesis", that is - the creation of new ethnic groups in societies of consensus is generally believed to be a fundamental disagreement that splits a nation in two.

[The Minsky Moment]

In both cases there is a narrative about a "natural" social order that is subverted by external repression.  In one case the natural order is communally utopian in nature in the other it is capitalistic.

And they themselves are set up against claims that either hierarchical states or the pursuit of interest are natural developments or natural conditions of the human experience.

Not at all - although such claims exist and have been made throughout history, it is also possible to reject the use of "nature" and what is "natural" as a framework altogether.

If Graeber or anyone else wants to make claims that the universe of viable social and economic orders is much broader than those currently accepted in today's Davos Man World and that political
space should be expanded to allow consideration of such possibilities, that's fine.  It's an argument that I think has been made more effectively elsewhere, for example in Roberto Unger's Free Trade Reimagined: The World Division of Labor and the Method of Economics.