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File this under "B", for "Boo Fucking Hoo"

Started by CountDeMoney, May 31, 2016, 05:58:33 AM

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Jacob

Quote from: Berkut on May 31, 2016, 11:55:25 AM
There are ways to accomplish what she wanted to accomplish that didn't involve, as an example, making her mom think she had been abducted and murdered.

Yeah for sure.

derspiess

Quote from: Berkut on May 31, 2016, 10:12:47 AM
Quote from: derspiess on May 31, 2016, 08:58:54 AM
What a great use of police time & manpower to track her down.  They should send her a bill.

Why send her the bill? She isn't the one who asked them to track her down...

Because it was her fault by voluntarily becoming a missing person.  There's no scenario where her mom would not have gone to the police about it.
"If you can play a guitar and harmonica at the same time, like Bob Dylan or Neil Young, you're a genius. But make that extra bit of effort and strap some cymbals to your knees, suddenly people want to get the hell away from you."  --Rich Hall

Barrister

Okay, so I'm going to stick up for the kid.

Well not for the vanishing act, that was inconsiderate and rude in the way only a 19 year old can be.

But it IS a "boo hoo" that a kid that smart, driven and capable felt herself driven away from a full ride ivy league education.  That's a tremendous gift that she felt compelled to throw away.

The article at the end mentions a Washington POst article on the difficulty of being poor at an ivy league school.  I tracked it down - it's an interesting read:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/for-the-poor-in-the-ivy-league-a-full-ride-isnt-always-what-they-imagined/2016/05/16/5f89972a-114d-11e6-81b4-581a5c4c42df_story.html

I don't know if this kid was going through something similar or not, but it sounds reasonable.  I can imagine the isolation she must have felt - in a completely different environment, largely cut off from her family and any old friends.  She tries to make new friends, but is very aware that she feels like she "doesn't belong".
Posts here are my own private opinions.  I do not speak for my employer.

Berkut

Quote from: derspiess on May 31, 2016, 12:01:54 PM
Quote from: Berkut on May 31, 2016, 10:12:47 AM
Quote from: derspiess on May 31, 2016, 08:58:54 AM
What a great use of police time & manpower to track her down.  They should send her a bill.

Why send her the bill? She isn't the one who asked them to track her down...

Because it was her fault by voluntarily becoming a missing person.  There's no scenario where her mom would not have gone to the police about it.

Yeah, probably true.

I guess I have to say she has the right to disappear if she wants.

But she doesn't have the right to avoid the consequences of doing so, when those consequences are pretty obvious to anyone.
"If you think this has a happy ending, then you haven't been paying attention."

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Berkut

Quote from: Barrister on May 31, 2016, 12:12:28 PM
Okay, so I'm going to stick up for the kid.

Well not for the vanishing act, that was inconsiderate and rude in the way only a 19 year old can be.

But it IS a "boo hoo" that a kid that smart, driven and capable felt herself driven away from a full ride ivy league education.  That's a tremendous gift that she felt compelled to throw away.

The article at the end mentions a Washington POst article on the difficulty of being poor at an ivy league school.  I tracked it down - it's an interesting read:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/for-the-poor-in-the-ivy-league-a-full-ride-isnt-always-what-they-imagined/2016/05/16/5f89972a-114d-11e6-81b4-581a5c4c42df_story.html

I don't know if this kid was going through something similar or not, but it sounds reasonable.  I can imagine the isolation she must have felt - in a completely different environment, largely cut off from her family and any old friends.  She tries to make new friends, but is very aware that she feels like she "doesn't belong".

I wish I had had her problems.
"If you think this has a happy ending, then you haven't been paying attention."

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DGuller


garbon

No. I can't think at all why one would want those problems. Course Languish answer to mental anguish is to buck up so...
"I've never been quite sure what the point of a eunuch is, if truth be told. It seems to me they're only men with the useful bits cut off."
I drank because I wanted to drown my sorrows, but now the damned things have learned to swim.

Berkut

Quote from: garbon on May 31, 2016, 12:20:47 PM
No. I can't think at all why one would want those problems. Course Languish answer to mental anguish is to buck up so...

Well, you went to an elite University, so I could imagine how you would not understand how one might want the problem of "I am going, for free, to one of the best schools in the country, but I feel socially awkward..."

Personally, I think that would be a pretty great problem to have compared to the problems of, oh, 95% of other college freshman aged people.
"If you think this has a happy ending, then you haven't been paying attention."

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CountDeMoney

No shit.  Surprise, the local golden child goes to college and finds out she's not The Shit like she was back home, like that's a plotline we've never seen before.  Stop the presses.

People would kill a stranger for the opportunity at an "Ivy League life", and she opts out like it's a coat she doesn't like.  Columbia University.  Jesus Christ.

When she's 28 and Deputy Assistant Barrista General, Latte Division, she'll wish she had that Columbia degree.

The disappearing act is just the icing on this cupcake of bullshit.

Maladict

#39
Quote from: Monoriu on May 31, 2016, 11:22:14 AM
Quote from: Maladict on May 31, 2016, 11:17:02 AM
Quote from: Monoriu on May 31, 2016, 11:14:36 AM
I think growing up means you do what you want to do, epecially if you are burned out.

fyp

Say, you have a child, you have a pet, you have a job, you have signed contracts.  Do you just say, oh I am burned out, so I don't want to take care of my child, or my dog, I don't want to go to work this week, I want to forget my mortgage?  That's what children do.  Adults take responsibility and do what they have to do, even if deep down they don't want to do it.

I got burned out some time ago, I asked for and was given sufficient time to recover. I also asked for changes in my workload, same complexity but things that didn't suit me out and other things I preferred to do in. I'm doing mostly the same thing but I'm enjoying it significantly more and I'm probably more productive too. I wish I'd done it earlier, but at least a valuable lesson learned.
And yes, my company was very accomodating. If it had not been I knew I would have to look for a new job soon. But that probably would have worked out for the best too, in the end.

The cure for a burnout is a change, not mindlessly continuing and hiding behind responsibilities.
Of course running away is a childish desparate response, but there are other options. Probably fairly easy ones too, if you recognize the problem early on.

edit: fixed my post.

DGuller

Quote from: Berkut on May 31, 2016, 12:24:22 PM
Quote from: garbon on May 31, 2016, 12:20:47 PM
No. I can't think at all why one would want those problems. Course Languish answer to mental anguish is to buck up so...

Well, you went to an elite University, so I could imagine how you would not understand how one might want the problem of "I am going, for free, to one of the best schools in the country, but I feel socially awkward..."

Personally, I think that would be a pretty great problem to have compared to the problems of, oh, 95% of other college freshman aged people.
:yes: I bet she has reading comprehension figured out, at least.

CountDeMoney

Quote from: garbon on May 31, 2016, 12:20:47 PM
No. I can't think at all why one would want those problems. Course Languish answer to mental anguish is to buck up so...

LOL :stupidtreemascot:

Barrister

Quote from: Berkut on May 31, 2016, 12:13:33 PM
I wish I had had her problems.

So because you had a rougher situation you can't feel any sympathy for her?
Posts here are my own private opinions.  I do not speak for my employer.

garbon

Quote from: Berkut on May 31, 2016, 12:24:22 PM
Quote from: garbon on May 31, 2016, 12:20:47 PM
No. I can't think at all why one would want those problems. Course Languish answer to mental anguish is to buck up so...

Well, you went to an elite University, so I could imagine how you would not understand how one might want the problem of "I am going, for free, to one of the best schools in the country, but I feel socially awkward..."

Personally, I think that would be a pretty great problem to have compared to the problems of, oh, 95% of other college freshman aged people.

Awesome. So maybe we should all shut up about all of our problems as people in say...Syria almost all have it worse off.
"I've never been quite sure what the point of a eunuch is, if truth be told. It seems to me they're only men with the useful bits cut off."
I drank because I wanted to drown my sorrows, but now the damned things have learned to swim.

Admiral Yi

Quote from: Barrister on May 31, 2016, 12:12:28 PM
But it IS a "boo hoo" that a kid that smart, driven and capable felt herself driven away from a full ride ivy league education.

As a minor quibble, I don't see any evidence she is driven, and quite a bit that she is not.  Smart kids can and do coast through high school.