Author Topic: The Off Topic Topic  (Read 3635843 times)

Sheilbh

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76080 on: September 17, 2020, 12:11:14 pm »
Let's bomb Russia!

Eddie Teach

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76081 on: September 17, 2020, 12:58:27 pm »
It sounds like a good starting premise for an "impure" movie to me; but I'm probably a bad person  :hmm:

I think you should write a screenplay.
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Sheilbh

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76083 on: September 17, 2020, 01:17:49 pm »
It sounds like a good starting premise for an "impure" movie to me; but I'm probably a bad person  :hmm:
I don't know why but it made me think of a Twitter thread I recently saw about a 12th century Middle Irish story Middle Irish story about lesbians accidentally having a baby.

A woman goes up to the king and asks him to determine the baby's father because she's not had sex with a man in a long time. The king asks if she's had "playful mating" with another woman - which she says she has. So the king basically says well she must have had sex with her husband beforehand and the semen fell into your womb during your "tumbling".

At this point - for reasons I don't fully understand - a priest falls out of the sky and announces that he made a deal with a demon (a dreadful deal - basically the priest gets some nice woodwork furniture out of it - "I had built a house, and there was no craftsman in the world that I thought good enough to make the woodwork. And a demon came to me in the shape of a man, and he made the woodwork in the house, and he would take no payment except that I should bow down to him."). Because of the deal, demons have been carrying him while flying about for the last 7 years but they then overheard the king who was speaking truth so the demons scattered, freeing the priest.

There are then various different versions of this story in other records: 15th century manuscript, an epilogue to a 16th century bardic poem (written by the Chief Justice of the Common Pleas:lol), another 16th century version. It's really interesting because the bit that they get prudish about isn't these lesbian parents running around but the mention of "semen" which gets cut out in later versions.

In one of the 16th century versions they explicitly say the inability of her husband to satisfy her is why the second woman starts "tumbling" with the other woman :lol:
Let's bomb Russia!

The Brain

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76084 on: September 17, 2020, 01:54:45 pm »
I like the part in the History of the Franks by Gregory of Tours where he casually mentions a male cross-dresser.
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Barrister

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76085 on: September 17, 2020, 05:04:45 pm »
Just saw Guy Lafleur was trending on Twitter.  I thought "oh fuck, not another one".

But no - they're just making a movie about him.

Richard Hakluyt

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76086 on: September 17, 2020, 11:25:01 pm »
It sounds like a good starting premise for an "impure" movie to me; but I'm probably a bad person  :hmm:
I don't know why but it made me think of a Twitter thread I recently saw about a 12th century Middle Irish story Middle Irish story about lesbians accidentally having a baby.

A woman goes up to the king and asks him to determine the baby's father because she's not had sex with a man in a long time. The king asks if she's had "playful mating" with another woman - which she says she has. So the king basically says well she must have had sex with her husband beforehand and the semen fell into your womb during your "tumbling".

At this point - for reasons I don't fully understand - a priest falls out of the sky and announces that he made a deal with a demon (a dreadful deal - basically the priest gets some nice woodwork furniture out of it - "I had built a house, and there was no craftsman in the world that I thought good enough to make the woodwork. And a demon came to me in the shape of a man, and he made the woodwork in the house, and he would take no payment except that I should bow down to him."). Because of the deal, demons have been carrying him while flying about for the last 7 years but they then overheard the king who was speaking truth so the demons scattered, freeing the priest.

There are then various different versions of this story in other records: 15th century manuscript, an epilogue to a 16th century bardic poem (written by the Chief Justice of the Common Pleas:lol), another 16th century version. It's really interesting because the bit that they get prudish about isn't these lesbian parents running around but the mention of "semen" which gets cut out in later versions.

In one of the 16th century versions they explicitly say the inability of her husband to satisfy her is why the second woman starts "tumbling" with the other woman :lol:

 :lol:

Good to know that the medieval Irish were relaxed about "tumbling"  :cool:

Nowadays priests can go to IKEA instead of swearing fealty to demons.

I suppose that the danger of the semen is that a child could be fathered by the wrong person and property/titles could therefore also end up in the wrong hands?

Tyr

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76087 on: September 18, 2020, 01:50:47 am »
So that's why it's called tumbler :shock:
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Razgovory

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76088 on: September 18, 2020, 01:05:01 pm »
Rosh Hasanah falls on National Cheeseburger day this year.
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Valmy

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76089 on: September 18, 2020, 01:31:55 pm »
Rosh Hasanah falls on National Cheeseburger day this year.

An unkosher snack for a very kosher holiday.
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Eddie Teach

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76090 on: September 18, 2020, 01:32:33 pm »
They should put it on Yom Kippur. Then you can binge a half dozen cheeseburgers and spend the rest of the day atoning.
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But that's the way I like it, baby, I don't want to live forever.

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Malthus

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76091 on: September 18, 2020, 02:34:46 pm »
It sounds like a good starting premise for an "impure" movie to me; but I'm probably a bad person  :hmm:
I don't know why but it made me think of a Twitter thread I recently saw about a 12th century Middle Irish story Middle Irish story about lesbians accidentally having a baby.

A woman goes up to the king and asks him to determine the baby's father because she's not had sex with a man in a long time. The king asks if she's had "playful mating" with another woman - which she says she has. So the king basically says well she must have had sex with her husband beforehand and the semen fell into your womb during your "tumbling".

At this point - for reasons I don't fully understand - a priest falls out of the sky and announces that he made a deal with a demon (a dreadful deal - basically the priest gets some nice woodwork furniture out of it - "I had built a house, and there was no craftsman in the world that I thought good enough to make the woodwork. And a demon came to me in the shape of a man, and he made the woodwork in the house, and he would take no payment except that I should bow down to him."). Because of the deal, demons have been carrying him while flying about for the last 7 years but they then overheard the king who was speaking truth so the demons scattered, freeing the priest.

There are then various different versions of this story in other records: 15th century manuscript, an epilogue to a 16th century bardic poem (written by the Chief Justice of the Common Pleas:lol), another 16th century version. It's really interesting because the bit that they get prudish about isn't these lesbian parents running around but the mention of "semen" which gets cut out in later versions.

In one of the 16th century versions they explicitly say the inability of her husband to satisfy her is why the second woman starts "tumbling" with the other woman :lol:

Heh I wonder if that attitude could have been influenced by the odd lacunae in Leviticus - male homosexuality is expressly labelled an abomination and prohibited, but there is no mention, thus no prohibition, against female homosexuality.
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HisMajestyBOB

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76092 on: September 19, 2020, 09:17:16 pm »
Rosh Hasanah falls on National Cheeseburger day this year.

Man, God really does have it out for the Jews.  :(
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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76093 on: September 19, 2020, 09:19:24 pm »
Of course HE does.  That is sort of the point of the religion if I am reading it right...
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Richard Hakluyt

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Re: The Off Topic Topic
« Reply #76094 on: September 20, 2020, 02:00:46 am »
Yeah, "chosen people" is a bit two-edged really  :huh: